Matthew 5:4

Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted. I truly appreciate it when God speaks to me so clearly it really does help to know I am not alone. Craig broke down for the first time tonight. I was in a way relieved. He has been so awesome and supportive to me but I hadn't seen him show any emotions himself since we found out and I knew he cared and I knew he was struggling, he has been snappy with the kids and that is a tell tale sign that he is not ok. We have been talking a lot the last couple days about the future and about our very missed angel. I asked him yesterday if he could call my grandma and let her know that we lost the baby because well I just can't its still to painful to say the words and I just wasn't up to making that phone call. We were on the way to meet friends for dinner an early celebration of my birthday and he just started to tear up, I said whats wrong and he said just give him a minute he collected himself and said he just can't say the words out loud, its to hard for him to say them, I knew exactly how he felt, saying the words out loud just makes it all real. Writing them is much easier then having to force them out of your mouth the sound of them is agony upon your heart because well it makes it all so real and final, our baby is gone, we will never meet him or her until we go home to be with God. Yes what a beautiful thing it will be to meet our sweet baby but we rather have him or her in our arms here on earth with us. We will always miss you our sweet loved baby.