Having a rough day

I don't know why today is hard but it just a rough one. I haven't felt happy at all today. Try but just can't get there so I expect that this is just going to be a sad one and I am trying to just push through it. I am doing a favor for a dear friend from our old church tomorrow and though today it feels like an overwhelming process to put the smiley face on and go I know that working on some normalcy is better then sitting here and feeling sad all day, at least it will break up the time and be one day closer to moving forward. Right now it feels like I am stuck at a stand still there is no forwards or backwards. Backwards at least would have me sitting in bliss with a baby growing in my stomach. Now is a just another day full of pain. Forward is hopefully healing and a new blessing. For now its just hurt.